As parents, we all want to provide the perfect childhood for our children. Many of us have to fight off urges to be too overbearing and intrude too much in our desire to impact positive experiences, and at Smart Kids Development Center, our daycare and preschool educators are well-trained in riding this fence properly.
What are some of the most common parenting and educating mistakes we see from parents and educators who have kids’ best interests in mind, but may not know how to properly channel those desires? Here are a few examples.
There’s no question we live in a dangerous world, but shielding children from every bit of this is both impossible and impractical. Certain risks are absolutely necessary as part of growing up, and kids need to fall down a few times to learn how to pick themselves up, so to speak.
Removing all risk from their lives, and rescuing them too quickly from even moderately stressful situations, can lead to high levels of arrogance and low self-esteem. Kids get used to someone rescuing them, and assume that this safety valve will always be present.
Research has indicated that while positivity is great for children, too much can be a negative. Kids are smart, and they become more and more perceptive as they get older – if their parents are the only ones telling them how awesome they are, eventually they’ll notice and start to doubt mom and dad’s objectivity. They’ll feel good, but will also become disconnected with reality and will learn to cheat and exaggerate to avoid difficult realities.
Your child loves you, even if there are times where it doesn’t seem that way. Don’t let guilt from the times when you have to discipline them or tell them no overwhelm your knowledge of what qualifies as good parenting.
This is a careful balance for adults to find – that between allowing kids to experience things themselves and sharing their own experiences. There’s plenty of room for both – focus on sharing how you felt during some of these tough times, rather than simply how you reacted.
Finally, parents must practice what we preach. Kids will absolutely notice if we act in different ways than what we demand of them, especially in broad themes like accountability and responsibility. Show them what it means to act properly, and they’ll follow your lead.
Want to learn more about properly approaching children, or interested in any of our child care services? Speak to the educators at Smart Kids Development Center today.